Longing for Love-Dating After Divorce
The title of the old song, Gimme Some Lovin’ seems to fit the feeling that often comes during separation and divorce. Emptiness, loneliness, and a haunting question about whether or not we are still loveable can give us the strong urge to find love. Those feelings represent what I call the “Empty Love Pot.”
If we can find someone to love us then we can fill the loneliness. We can reassure ourselves that we are indeed still loveable. We can be happy.
It’s a natural way to feel wouldn’t you agree? We want to heal the loss by finding a replacement. We want to know that we can be found desirable by another person. We think it will make us happy.
Yet, getting involved with another person too quickly can end up deepening our wounds if that relationship does not work out. Furthermore, it can subject us to repeating the same relationship mistakes made in marriage. So what should we do if we want to find a good mate?
Heal first.
Healing first doesn’t mean you’ll never be hurt again. On the other hand, finding another person won’t really heal the wounds of your divorce. Focus first on your own healing. Take a good look at yourself and get whatever help you need. Pray for insight. By healing divorce wounds you will be a happier person and stand to have a healthier future relationship.
I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you.
Psalm 32:8 NIV
How about You?
Do you have a positive insight about dating after divorce? Share your insight with others by leaving a comment below.
Not Sure How to Set Yourself Up for Dating by Healing First?
Renee’s book Peace After Divorce is a great guidebook that supports healing from divorce and gives you strategies for not taking old wounds into a new relationship. Get the help you need.
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