7 Ways to Deal with Fear in Separation and Divorce

Nothing is quite as fear provoking as instability combined with an unknown future.  And isn’t that the story of separation and divorce–at least for a while.  But fear doesn’t have to get the best of you.  Here are seven steps you can take to harness fear in your life.

Squash the Power of Fear

1.  Acknowledge that feeling fear is normal.  Change is stressful for most people.  Major life changes even more so.  You’re not going crazy just because separation and divorce have caused you to feel anxious and afraid.

2.  Make a list of your top fears.  Well now doesn’t that just sound like fun?  Yet, it helps.  If you’re going to fight a battle you need to know who the enemy is so you can arm yourself accordingly.

3.  Relax your body.  Fear and anxiety can take their toll on your health. Several times a day consciously become aware of tension in your body.  Relax those muscles and take a deep breath. Take a walk or exercise in some way to release tension from your body.

4.  Put fear in perspective. Quite often, fear tricks the mind into magnifying potential dangers.  Concerns become bigger than reality.  If you let them, fears can dominate your life.  Don’t let them!

Sometimes fear can be your friend.  If you or your children are in harm’s way, fear can motivate you to take actions that keep you safe.  If you are a victim of domestic violence click here and here.

5.  Tame the beast.  Even when you are scared and don’t have much confidence in yourself, confidence in God provides the strength to do what is needed to conquer the debilitating nature of fear.  Faith in God is a bridge.  It crosses the gap between the paralysis of fear, and the courage to act in the face of fear.”

Build your faith by praying and by learning more and more about God.  You can count on His promises.

6.  Take action.  Look at your list of fears and identify positive actions you can take to move through and past fear.  Do you fear you can’t handle the challenges of everyday life alone?  Develop a plan to simplify your life.  If finances are a concern, make a budget or seeking out a financial planner. Attend a class such as Financial Peace University.  Are you afraid of dating again?  Relieve that stress by setting the idea of dating aside until you have adequately healed from divorce.  It will likely take time to work through the fears stirred up by divorce but with God’s help you can do it and your life will be better!

7.  Build a Support Network.  Don’t wing it alone.  Build a support network of resources to help you overcome your fears.  Above all, filter your fears and your actions through prayer.  Talking with God will add stability to your sense of well-being.  Listen to God and He will direct your path.  Trust in God and he will hold your hand and give you peace.

Faith in God is a bridge.  It crosses the gap between the paralysis of fear, and the courage to act in the face of fear.”

From Peace after Divorce

You don’t have to live in fear. Become intentional about addressing your fears. Follow the seven steps above and you will be on your way.

Christian Inspiration:  For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.  2 Timothy 1:7  NIV

How about You?

What is your greatest fear as it relates to your separation and divorce?  Please comment below.

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